Prom is one of the most important occasions in a child’s life, and choosing the right clothes for it is a critical stage of planning.
Her mother appeared happy to help when the Reddit users was getting ready for hers. The woman also made an offer to have her dress finished with a touch-up at a friend’s house.
However, the mother felt shamed for her child when she saw the girl’s choice of attire.
Little did the mother realize that this would make the girl choose to reject something even more.
Although this adolescent was excited to attend her homecoming, her family started criticizing her outfit.
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But she devised a strategy to recoup her.
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Policing their kids’ outfits won’t earn parents much respect
The desire to show your independence through the clothing you wear typically begins in adolescence.
“There are very few ways kids can establish independence or let you know their will when they’re very young, but they do have some control over what’s touching their bodies,” Aaron E. Carroll, M. D., professor of pediatrics at Indiana University School of Medicine. Children may struggle getting dressed, also, but that’s less a informed play for freedom and more a response to being restrained, Dr. Carroll explained.
As you get older, the wars shift. But according to Dr. Carroll, kids have to offer in. Not just because attire is such a symbol of freedom, but also because they does, similar to the mom from the Reddit post, get won.
Kids may initially appease their families by wearing whatever it is that they are made to do, but there are always times that they will switch out once they are out of sight.
Interesting is that parents can benefit from having command over their clothes in the long run because it might make them more likely to listen to their older friends when they do produce comments or suggestions about their garments, according to Dr. Carroll.
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Parents should be asking “who they’re trying to appease” and “what they’re trying to appease” before starting a conversation about apparel. Catherine Manning, the founder of Melbourne-based seminars that provide in-school self-esteem programs for girls and boys, and the director of the children’s rights advocacy group State No 4 Kids, is one of the founders.
“A lot of those costume standards are quite subjective. And if a]girl] wants to wear a shirt top]to] a university gown- up day, why do we have a problem with that?” Holding.
She thinks that sexism and discrimination are a part of society’s historical obsession with girls’ clothes. “We’re not constantly looking at men’s attire,” she said. The majority of women and women’s clothing codes have their roots in sexism and religious institutions that are obsessed with purity.
Although it’s not necessary for parents to not respond to their daughters about clothing, Manning believes it’s important to minimize veering into shaming place, where girls’ clothes and bodies are scrutinized for how they present them and what they do with them.
The slightest remark about your daughter’s attire can have a really lasting effect on her, Manning continued. “So we really do have to be careful.”
Perhaps the Redditor’s mother should have paused and reconsidered her discomfort rather than criticizing her daughter.