Friends and family were content with this. But, my now-brother-in-law’s partner interpreted this as a private small. My husband and I both texted each other to demand that she attend. I met with her to explain the seating ( my aunt’s husband was n’t going! ) and said it was n’t meant as a slight. She made it clear that she would not pardon me.
Imagine my surprise when she wore a open mesh gown with a black bikini and no underwear to our spiritual marriage. The ceremony went well. She has never been known to wear presenting clothing. I’m an just kid, and this was an important time for my kids, so I am unhappy that she thought this was the way to voice her emotions.
What should we do after the ceremony, which was fantastic and we had the best time? My husband and I have always been close friends with her. We’ve personally never had a great see, since she screams at chefs, is disrespectful to my brother-in-law’s companions ( I think he’s been isolated from them ), etc., but not voiced these problems. I’m currently not yet sure how to act around her.
It does n’t help that my husband’s family insist this must have been an accident and we are being paranoid. They want my husband to approach his nephew to “hear his part.”
We believe his brother will make the proposal quickly, which is certainly his choice, but it also means spending more time with her. I want to let this go, but on top of experiencing disrespected by the girl, I then feel betrayed by the community. How do I move forwards?
— Angry
The friend’s big error wasn’t to spin you the bird in a game dress. ( Though, well. Speak about introducing yourself to others. When it wasn’t really about her privately, it was taking her court rejection as a personal attack.
Agree? Therefore immediately use it to express your disgust:
You’ve taken her costume as a private attack. But if you reread your letter, I think ( hope ) you’ll see the girlfriend is an angry, insecure, unstable, chaotic emergency of a person — which is no more a personal statement about you than your courthouse rule was about her.
How individuals respond to situations is usually about them, ultimately. However, it’s important to post more emotional sticky notes that someone who is in a clearly destructive place is subject to acting out, but one must disengage appropriately. This is what I’ll define as “visible perhaps to untrained eyes, through behaviors like screaming at staff, isolating from friends, and baring spite-nipples.”
Meaning: She didn’t “disrespect” you with her clothes, she called attention to herself. ( You had all the option of choosing whether to grant it. ) Your husband’s family hasn’t “betrayed” you, they’re merely as distracted as you are by her show, into believing it deserves a response at all.
She deserves to be praised in one way: for the duration of the personal hot grid. That concern is only worsening for your brother-in-law and his relatives.
You asked about her wedding shenanigans, but I addressed them, but the actual title is the that you’ve witnessed but never discussed.
Consequently. Cancel the outfit incident. Politely disconnect from the girl. Nurture the brother-in-law bond, he needs allies she can’t scare away. and quickly read.