The lady asked if she was in the inappropriate for implementing the dress code for her fantasy/renaissance-themed ceremony in a new article shared to the favorite. Before revealing that they even met at a renaissance fair, she continued to describe her and her partner’s common interests, which ranged from comic books to video games.
She noted that when she spoke with her” close friends,” they all thought it was a “great idea.” She then went on to explain how she described the renaissance style and dress code.
So we distributed the invitations and an accompanying letter outlining our intentions for a themed wedding as well as examples of what we wanted people to wear, the letter read. ” We included photos, descriptions, and budget categories that went from how to DIY a costume using old/thrifted clothes to just straight out buying something online. In order to resolve any issues, we also asked people to reach out to us.
The Reddit poster noted that friends told her that other people, including the groom’s family members, weren’t happy with the dress cold and were calling her a “bridezilla”.
She went on to share the guests’ candid thoughts about the dress code, adding: “They were saying we are being unreasonable, that this is ridiculous, that they don’t want to go if I’m going to get all up in arms over clothing”.
The woman specified that her soon- to- be mother- in- law and sister- in- law were “especially pissed”, so she reached out to them about the situation. However, things changed when the bride’s family began to criticize the bride for the dress code.
They claimed that I am ruining what should be a happy day by demanding that people don’t dress like idiots. They said everyone should be able to wear clothing that makes them feel at ease, and I feel very controlled. Although my partner advises me against listening to them, there are so many others who do the same.
She explained how she initially didn’t expect them to respond this way after explaining that she felt “pretty hurt” by the reactions to the dress code.
We went out of our way to include pictures and suggest as many very low budget options as possible, she said, “I assumed people would react this if I said everyone needed to go out and spend hundreds of dollars on costumes. I honestly didn’t think it was a big deal, but I’m having second thoughts about the whole theme wedding idea right now.”
In an edit to her post, she specified that in her invitation, she and her husband wrote that they don’t want wedding gifts, since they’d rather their guests “keep their money for themselves or use it for their outfits”. She also noted that “a normal floral spring /summer dress”- since many people already owned that- was a “low budget option “for the wedding, along with the “addition of a flower crown or belt”.
She noted that for “more masculine” outfits, she recommended” a linen shirt with a piece of fabric tied around your waist or a belt”. She also defended her dress code, saying, “I’m not very strict about it, just not things like a cocktail dress, a bodycon dress, or a formal suit and tie.”
In the edit, she added that it’s mainly her and her partner’s cousins, aunts, and uncles who have an issue with the dress code. However, these family members have “not directly contacted” the couple about their concerns.
The Reddit post has quickly gone viral, with more than 5, 900 upvotes, as of 21 March. In the comments, many people defended the bride and groom’s decision to have a themed wedding. Additionally, they criticized the guests who complained about the dress code.
“Themed weddings are fun. You gave them budget friendly options. These themed weddings are very popular and I’ve seen a lot of them. It is only for one day, not sure why they can’t go with the flow”, one wrote. “They have the option of not going”.
“People give dress codes for weddings all the time”, another added. “Yes, it’s strange to people not of the community. I am not into dressing up or ‘nerd’ interest, but if someone I cared about wanted wedding photos to fit a theme, dang it, I’m matching the theme”.
A third reaffirmed that you are permitted to have what you want on special occasions that are appropriate for you and that others are not allowed to think they are ridiculous and to decline to attend.
Some Reddit users, on the other hand, were against a dress code, with some suggesting that the bride should make it optional, giving guests the option to wear what they want. Additionally, they provided suggestions for how guests could unintentionally follow the wedding theme.
“At the very least, you should have listed it as an option. I don’t care how budget friendly you think it is, you shouldn’t force people to buy or make a costume for your wedding”, one wrote. Give people a simple prop that they can wear with nice clothes, but don’t make them dress like Ren Ren Faire, they might say.
The majority of those people won’t ever wear that outfit again, so it’s great that you’re including low-budget options, but making a costume takes time and money, and either the cost or the time is expensive, according to another person. The wedding theme can be as you please, but guests are welcome to dress up as well.
“A faire themed wedding sounds amazing, but dressing up should be optional. Your families appear to be normative and uneasy about the idea. You don’t want your guests put out- I’m assuming you’re inviting them because you want to continue to have a relationship”, a third wrote. “Honestly, it’s an easy fix. Please let us know in an email that the dress code is optional, but you’d love to see everyone in their sexiest.”